Live the life you don’t want to miss

Why would you keep taking everyday and not giving those days to living the way that you want to? 

If I asked you right now, what is it that you would answer are the life accomplishments that you will have achieved by the time you die? 

Travel? Business? Starting a family? Having ungodly amounts of money? What do you want to accomplish? 

The path that you are in right now, are you going to accomplish those dreams? I’m curious because I would give my left nut to say you aren’t. (And I like lefty) Is that going to change with out you busting your ass? 

NO! 

Of course it’s not going to. You have to get up MOVE and take charge of what is in front of you. Stop letting life happen to you and MAKE LIFE HAPPEN!! 

MOVE!! Do SOMETHING!! Anything! But move. Achieve. And most of all … LOVE! Love all of those that deserve it. Accomplish life. Kick its ass and make it you’re bitch! 

Advertisements

“Public Speaking Is Stupid, I’ll Never Do It”

Is it really, though? You are probably already doing it.

There is one very important thing that I have not addressed on this blog. The question of what exactly is public speaking.

Webster’s Dictionary defines it as “the art of effective oral communication with an audience”

This is a wide open application of the phrase.

To me, public speaking can be anything from a networking event where you do not know most people to a keynote speech. There are so many different situations that are considered public speaking, so much more than just getting on a stage and talking in front of a 100 people.Speaking in front of an audience can be as smile as the sales meeting that you have set up for the client that you have been wanting to speak to for a few months. There is so much undeniable power in having the confidence to speak to those people and know that your message is coming across.

I want you to take just a minute and think of a time that someone was doing some speaking in front of you. There are many places that this happens to us and we don’t even notice. Last time I went to Costco I had at least 5 different people talk to me about my solar panels, or my cable provider or even what cereal I would be purchasing. “Well, that’s sales, not public speaking”.

sales-meeting

Is there really any difference?

Sales is the antithesis of public speaking. There are few situations in most people’s lives where “effective oral communication with an audience” is more important than when your livelihood is on the line. You have about 10 seconds to captures someone’s attention in a sales meeting. There is never more of a cause to be effective in your communication skills with your audience.

This is a very brief outline of what public speaking is and how it is already affecting your life. There are so many more worlds where being able to feel comfortable in front of people WILL benefit you in your life. I have an interview with John Pope, the CEO and founder of Jive communications, that I will be posting soon and it will go to show you just how much public speaking is engrained in our lives and how he used it to turn his business into a 9 figure powerhouse.

Don’t ever be held back by a fear of being able to be in front of others. There is this world in front of you that you can grab by the horns make do what you want it to do. Don’t live scared of that bull!

There Is Only One Person That You Can Be On Stage!

BE YOU!

If there is a single point that you pull from the crazy rants that I spill on this blog it is this one thing.

If you are on stage, in front of a client or in a classroom, be yourself there. There is nothing in this world that will make everyone that you are speaking to disengage faster than a fake persona on the stage. More importantly than that though is NOTHING will engage an audience faster than someone who is comfortable enough to be themselves. If you are honest and authentic then they will engage.

I will at times feel myself holding back when I am speaking. Thinking the thoughts of “that’s not appropriate”. In those moments be yourself. Clearly, if the joke is offensive that is different, but never be afraid to be you. If you flail your arms like crazed chimpanzee when you talk to your friends then you should be like a crazed gorilla on stage. Don’t hit reverse push the rocket launch button!

monkey-flail

There is a confidence that exudes from a person who knows who they are and are comfortable with it. That’s the kind of confidence that you need as you are in front of people and all that attention is on you. So don’t shy away from it! Revel in it! Let the fact that all eyes are on you and you have the entire rooms attention be your motivation to show them what you are made of and just the kind of bad ass you can be!

5 Tips for Public Speaking or Presentation In Your Office

There are a very select few people that have absolutely no problems speaking in front of a crowd of people. One of the best speakers I have ever known, my dad, once told me, “It doesn’t matter how many times I have given the same speech in front of the same people, I will always have a butterfly in my stomach.” To this day that is something I think about every time I speak in front of any kind of crowd. You know what, that butterfly is totally ok. Check out our first tip!
1) Everyone is nervous!! So what!! Don’t let the nerves get to you. This is the most obvious tip that anyone could give you. You will then look at them and roll your eyes with the classic cliche of “Easier said than done.” I want you to take a look at your situation from a different point of view, though, every single person that is sitting there about to listen to you has and will have to speak in front of people at one point or another, and every single one of them will be full of the butterflies. Why does this even matter? They aren’t up here right now! It means that they understand. They get it if you have a stumble here or there. You don’t have to be 100% perfect in every inflection and pronunciation. In fact, if you do stumble over a word, laugh about it! Being a real person makes you easier to listen to. Let’s be clear, you don’t have free reign to bumble through this speech, which leads me to my next point.
2) Be prepared. Stumbling through a speaking opportunity is the fastest way to lose your audience. They will spend the entire time you are on stage thinking about how you just can’t seem to get it together. The way to combat that problem is to make sure that whatever happens you can roll with the punches. By roll with the punches I mean that if something were to change and throw you from your “scheduled speech” i.e. Someone has an important question that diverts the direction you were headed. If you know your material so well that even a screaming baby can’t throw you off your game, then you are ready to get on stage. The best way to be prepared is not to have everything written down word for word. This lends itself towards the stumble. If you are even slightly off with a pronunciation or misread one word you have written it can derail your flow and wreak havoc. However, if you have main points written down and you have prepared and studied your subject, then whatever happens in front of you can be taken in stride and your speech is like a single flowing river.
3) Practice. You may be saying you just told me to be prepared! Practice and preparation are hand in hand, yes, but the act of practicing your speech is so integral that it deserves its own bullet point. More important then the act of practice is the method. As I have mentioned before knowing the speech word for word is going to cause stumbles and “um’s”. Practice doesn’t mean to read it 153 times. You need to be in front of people! Grab a spouse, a son, a daughter, even a stranger and deliver your speech to them. Be clear though, you are not looking for feedback from them. YOU need to get used to being in front of people. Period. Doesn’t matter who. The feedback will come later in another point.
4) Get Feedback. You can’t have feedback from just anyone. That’s why we don’t want to hear the feedback that the stranger has to give. Let’s get our feedback from someone that we know will be totally honest. That knows the subject that you’ll be speaking on as well as anyone. You! We all have a smartphone or a webcam on a laptop easily at our disposal these days. Be sure to set it far enough away that you can see all that is around you as well because those hands you got moving all around need to be captured as well.
5) Be Yourself! This is the most important and also the hardest one to follow. Once on stage everyone wants to become this expert. Let me tell you something, experts are BORING!! No one wants to listen to someone drone on and on, but the guy or gal that everyone in the office knows and loves already, that person is way easier to listen too. You don’t have to be hilarious or crack jokes, (in fact I don’t recommend that) but if you are certain to be you, you relax and instantly become easier to listen and relate to.

Are You and Overnight Success Or An Iceberg?

Most of us have heard that an iceberg’s mass is under water right? You don’t see that mass majority of what that big slow block of cold water has going on. What in the world does that have to business and success? We will get to that.

It doesn’t take to many conversations with people who have achieved “overnight success” to realize that this term is totally and sorely misused.

Look at one company that many would consider being a flash uprising:

Uber – Started in 2009, Took 2 years before receiving any substantial funding and according to this article written by Fortune magazine only earlier this year became profitable.

I don’t know about you but taking 7 years, over $11.45B in investments, and countless hours from thousands of employees does not seem like an “overnight success” to me. That sounds like a whole bunch of grinding and late nights to me. Don’t just trust me on this, though. Maybe let’s take it from Travis Kalanick who is the co-founder and CEO of Uber. This is a very interesting interview that he did in Germany about a year ago. Listen to the first 10 minutes of what he is saying and tell me if you think that Uber was overnight.

If you don’t have time to listen right now I understand, do me a favor and find the time, I guarantee that you will not regret it. Let me break it down real quick. He talks about the first two companies that he created. Both are no longer. The second one he was sued for over $250B for in a PvP platform that he and others had created. Did those things stop him? Nope! In fact, he took that technology that he had been sued for and sold it back to the companies that had sued him for coming up with it. He refers to moving in with his GF because he had no money as his companies gave him no salary for over 4 years. While he continued to grind these things out and make something out of ultimately nothing.

Not one thing he said referred to the little money angel coming from the business gods and handing him his success “overnight”. We start to hear about a company all over the place and think that they just popped up and all of a sudden are making millions. I mean just raising that $11.5B in venture capital is to much work for 99% of the world!

You can’t talk on a subject like hard work without using too many cheesy adages.”You only get what you work for”, “Early bird gets the worm” and “You reap what you sow” are all common sentences for a reason. They are true. When was the last time you went to work and told the boss that you were going to go home and he still paid you? My guess is never. You really do get what you work for. I have come to realize that so many people have no clue what it is that they view as worth working for! Can you imagine that?!

Wait…

What do YOU think is worth your time. Tell me right now in detail what you want in life. Answers like happiness, money, success and good health probably come to your mind. That’s what I think of. Those are the most generic and basic answers we could come up with!

big-house-and-family

Really think about what it is that you want in your life.

How do you get happiness in your life? More money maybe? Better health? Closer family ties? Sitting on your couch? Hold on. That last one isn’t right.

None of these things come to you by sitting on your couch eating chips and playing video games. Even if you are sitting reading self-help books all about how you are going to take over the world! Not that you shouldn’t do that, but it does not make things happen within your life. Just reading the books does not mean that all of a sudden you are going to kick into gear and “Oh now I am ready. All of the good things can be showered upon me!” NOPE!

You get better health by getting your bum up in the morning and getting to the gym or even just the sidewalk. Whatever it takes to get that heart rate up just a little. The great part about that, not only will you be in better health, but you will, in fact, be happier. An increased heart rate brings better blood flow, which in turn brings the right hormones all over our body and makes us happier people.

You get more money by… Well, that kinda depends, does it not? How do you want it to come to you? Better pay at work? Show the boss that you deserve it! Get your mindset right and be productive. Want something more? Start a business! Sweet! That’s a TON of work just like Mr. Kalanick has told us.

By now I am sure you are sensing a pattern here. None of these are going to land in your lap. No matter how many good books you read, or videos you watch or Tony Robbins seminars that you attend. Those are all highly commendable and wonderful things to help you get headed in the right direction. They all have one thing in common. After doing them, you have to put them into action. You have to work along with the knowledge that you have acquired and turn it into the wisdom needed to make something of whatever it is that your goals are.

87% of an iceberg is never seen by the ships and people that move right on past it. It is hidden from our sight. Mother nature worked on that bad boy, though.

An overnight success is far from overnight. We just only see 13% of what went into making something special. That 13% is the culmination of the 87% of the time that someone spent working their tail off.

The question that we should be asking is do I have the determination to make an iceberg?

How Hard Are You Willing To Work?

I am a procrastinator of the highest level.

I don’t want to do anything but have a couple beers too many and play useless video games with my best friend who lives in LA.

I also have a drive. It doesn’t really go away but it is much too easy for me to quiet.

Recently, though, I can’t quiet it as much. I have been slowly filling my life with things that push me. As I cruise through Instagram posts, Facebook rants, and Netflix documentaries I am reminded that I have goals. I keep seeing people who have this “success” that I know I am capable of.

Do me and yourself a favor and watch a one and half hour documentary on Netflix about a guy named Steve Aoki it’s called “I’ll sleep when I am dead”. I know that a lot of you probably won’t know who he is and when you figure it out you are going to tell me to shove off because you aren’t into EDM/Screamo music. I don’t recommend it because you need to dig his vibe. At least not musically. Look at his drive. It is absurd. This guy put on over 300 shows in a year. Best part? He doesn’t sit in Vegas and just knock out show after show. In a single week, he will fly across the country more than 5 times. He has the Guinness world record for most miles traveled by a musician. He has, in the past 5 years, expanded his name to every continent. He has been the first person in his genre to do a concert in places like Malaysia. He was not appreciated in an island in Spain called Ibiza. This island has a huge influence in the EDM world. So what did he do? He through a huge concert there and continued to until he was loved and appreciated on that island. There was no give up in him. He now travels all over this world doing exactly what he loves to do! Who of us wouldn’t want that dream?

Now let’s swing to Instagram. One of my favorite feeds is maybe a little more well known. Dewayne “The Rock” Johnson. Everyone knows this guy. Check it out here

Give it a quick scroll. Look at most of his posts. He has a hashtag that is one that I wish I was smart enough to come up with. He ends a lot of his posts with #thehardestworkerintheroom.

Look at every person that has achieved the goals that you are looking up at in your life. The ones that are too overwhelming to be able to grasp. The ones that are more dream than goal. Do you know how they got there? They worked their god damn hands, fingers, feet and mostly soul to the bone. They put in the time that most people are not willing to put in.

No matter what your goals are, you can reach them IF you are willing to.

One last thing I want to leave you with. Unsurprisingly I have pulled this from the sports world. If you enjoy sport, the UFC fight that was this weekend was insane! To much fun to watch. Take a look at this quote from Connor McGregor. Hard work always wins.

image.jpg

He won the fight this weekend.

How Can Our Society Be This Wrong?!

For real, though?! We live in this society where people who struggle and push to try and make it are set up to fail! Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong, but especially those that are younger are in this position. I know that I am not the only one that sees it this way.

Now before I get too far into this there are PLENTY of exceptions to all of the things that I am about to say. But I am going to be referring to the vast majority of American families in the lower to middle class. The families that lost their houses when the market fell. Those families that are just now starting to get back on their feet from the horrible 2008 crash and the same families that are going to get royally screwed over when it happens all over again in the near future…

The other disclaimer that I have is that this is not the norm of how this blog will be going (most likely). As someone who has the ability to speak out, on occasion I feel as though we need to be able to do so.

This concept first took a hold in my brain during tax season. Even though it was meant to be funny there was a tweet that went around that truly struck home to me and got my mind rolling on just how broken our society is. Check this out:

Parolelogram season

Kinda hits home to me.

Of all the things that I learned in school and in the small amount of college that I took, not one person thought it prudent to teach me how to do taxes. I was never taught how to save money or what in all holy hell an IRA or 401K or mutual fund actually is. Yet, over and over again, I was told that when I get older I would use subjects such as geometry and pottery. That these classes would benefit me in the future.  

Taxes. IRA. Mutual Funds. 401K. These are things that are a massive part of or adult life and yet we were never taught, not only what they are, but how to correctly use them. How do we not teach our children such an essential part of what it is to be an adult? For goodness sake,  sexual education is still in its infancy and parents can choose to exclude their children from learning it. I understand that a lot of this information falls to the parents to impart to us as children, but it’s hard for our parents to pass along or teach us things that they were never taught themselves. For example, My dad grew up on a farm where he learned how to work on tractors and beat the tar out of his younger siblings. My grandpa had the mindset that the children didn’t need to know about the finances within the family. They were just kids and it was none of their business how the family got along. So if my dad was never taught about money, finances, taxes- how is he supposed to teach me? He is still learning how to figure all of that out as an adult, just like I am, simply because no one thought to start teaching us at a younger age. And we have come into an era now that our parents don’t even know some of these valuable lessons either!

I took a poll of my friends and a few others recently and asked how many of them knew how to do taxes or even how the process worked, and the sad truth was that almost all of them had to figure it out by themselves. I realize that we associate with those that are most similar to us and so that can skew my “official” results, but that doesn’t change the fact that this is still a clear problem. 

Another thought I had in relation to this generation growing up without having the proper knowledge they so desperately need as adults, is that while obtaining any knowledge in the form of higher education, we are saddling these kids with more debt than ever before and at such a young age. Check out this fun little video put out by attn.com’s Facebook page.

 

The average student in 2016 will come out of college with $37,172 of debt, which is up 6% from just last year according to the website StudentLoanHero.Com. 

We are telling these kids that they have to be adults on their own at 19-20 years old and that in order to succeed they have to go the this totally over priced establishment  in order to “be a success.”

I am in no way saying that college is not the right answer. I believe in two things: 1) You are a success based on your own achievements, not because you have a plaque on your wall. You are a success by the way you get through life, the choices that you make, and the hard work that you put in.  That last part is key. hard work. And number 2) We as adults need to set up these kids to succeed. We need to give them the tools they need in order for them to see the world with confidence, to stare it down and take it by storm. We don’t want them to be in constant worry about everything that comes their way, wondering how in the world they are going to make it through to the next step. We don’t want them to be fearful. We want them to be confident. 

This is something that needs attention brought to it in any way possible. Even though I have no followers as of yet lol. I will promote this blog though and we will make sure that we get this word out! So share this one if you would. Not for me but for the next generation of kids in hopes that someday we can help make a change in this society.

The Art of Being Unforgettable

I have been rewriting and rewriting this first post. I chose what I think to be a pretty good name for this blog, but along with it, I am also putting out there some pretty bold promises. I am telling you that I can help you to become unforgettable! In this 21st Century, where everything moves so fast that we would probably forget our children if people didn’t keep handing them back asking “Does this belong to you?”

I have been contemplating this blog for over a year now, searching and thinking about the best way to put this together. What do I know that people may actually want to know about?

Hmmm. I play video games… Wow is that lame and over written about.

Umm. I’ve been through a divorce! Cool so has 75% of Americans.

Then it hit me! I talk! I do it in front of people. I have been doing it in front of people my whole life and that makes me unique. Unlike most of American’s my #1 fear in life is dying, because public speaking in a brush off the old shoulder.

So I sat down and started to think about what to call the blog or how to put things “down on paper.” I looked a few quotes for ideas about the name. Maybe a funny thing. I found something that I knew I had to use the instant I found it because it was exactly my thoughts only she imparted it a million times better than I ever could:

how-you-made-them-feel

She ABSOLUTELY nailed it.

I realized that what I have that I could help people with was more than just public speaking, although that will be the main part of this blog, but there is more to it. That feeling that you leave a person is something that will stick with them for forever. That can completely shape a relationship from the beginning to the end. It can take what would be a normal acquaintance to an important friendship or a wonderfully profitable partnership.

That is a little bit of a breakdown of what I am hoping to accomplish with this rant page that I will call a blog. I want to help in every way possible. Debunking bad ideas or ones that just plain aren’t worth your time. Giving pointers and maybe even having a few others give their much more brilliant ideas than mine. The important thing to me as that hopefully people will use it and have questions and we can discuss it all together.

So this is me. My name is Seth. Let’s do this together.